insomnia

It's midnight and I can't sleep. What has been going on here the last few months? I know something exciting is about to happen, I  can feel it. A big change perhaps? Like Hungary?  Its weird because when I moved to Hungary, life altering change didn't seem like such a big deal and the stakes were higher. Or I just don't remember the sleepless nights because the happy memories have replaced them. If only I could get some answers or get to sleep. If only life was so simple…

change

The past week was a busy one. I know change is coming but sometimes its difficult for me to come to terms with it. As much as I love the thrill of impulse and new beginnings, a little part of me always feels this sadness inside that I can't express in words. Sometimes I wish I could freeze time and stay in the moment for just a little while longer but all good thing must come to an end.

This morning Zay sent me a little clip from last summer and watching it made me instantly smile and lifted the heavy feeling inside me instantly and transported me back to the summer. I think thats exactly what I needed to end such a week. I just need to figure out how to upload this stuff.

ramblings on life

Ever have one of those talk which really puts life into perspective? I had one of those conversations with a patient today. We get so stuck in our little bubble that we forget the bigger picture. I do this so often. I am always complaining about things that are of no significance while there are others who struggling just to keep alive for a few more hours. Sometimes I feel that I look for things to complain about just so I have something to do. I will just have to remind myself a little harder that 'don't fret the small stuff' life is just too short.

Also have to keep reminding myself that I only get one life and I really should at least attempt to do all the things I have always wanted to do. In the end if things are meant to be they will work out and lead to bigger opportunities or you will walk away with an experience/story to tell.

On the subject of story telling and having conversation with patients; some of my favourite patients are old people ( the 75 and above age group). They are living storybooks. Some of them have lived these amazing lives. I once had a patient who was a community lawyer until she was 60 and then after retiring she studied art history and now she is the president of an art preservation society. She travels to many exotic countries and on art tours. If my life is half as fulfilling as hers I will consider it well lived.

home cooked meals

Although we are not even half way through the week yet, its already a winner. Have had six amazing home cooked meals already and feeling my energy levels going up and up. I love food especially home made food. Both eating it and cooking it. Cooking real offers an outlet of stress relief for me. I am always up for making a meal.

Tonight I went to a Metafit session with a personal trainer and celebrated by cooking up a salmon salad as a treat for dinner post workout. I have a huge smile face and can't tell if its the endorphins from the exercise or the delicious home cooked meal. There is even some leftover for lunch tomorrow. I think there is going to be a few people with food envy at work come lunch time tomorrow!

sunday

Yesterday, the holiday season officially ended at our house. Even though I went back to work on the 2nd, it still felt like I was on holiday the two days I was at work. As a result there was very little productivity over the weekend especially on Sunday. Of note the few things I accomplished were getting the eBay packages and returns from online shopping ready to be posted and paying for my exam (OK that one is kind of a big thing). Most of the weekend was spent like this…

Drinking lots of tea and eating up treats from Paris while enjoying some Woody Allen movies. I can watch the opening sequence from Manhattan, Midnight in Paris and To Rome with Love again and again. Sometimes that is exactly what you need to recharge your batteries. I think am ready to start the daily grind once more. Check in here in a few weeks days to see if I feel the same.